I have been mocked for a lot of things in my life. My fear of frogs. My love obsession with gray. My in ability to finish a thing and pull it off with a sort of grace. My crush a week. My solid nicknaming skills. My random thoughts. My love of cheap wine and cheap beer. I say the wrong thing at the wrong time always. My mom and I have been known to laugh in moments of hymns at church because we can’t keep in tune (and she’s a singer). I get mocked. I have never been mocked more than I have lately for my love of plaid. I feel it is time to tackle this subject head on.
There may be some deep seeded psychological reason for my love of plaid. Maybe I long for a golfer or a boy from a J.Crew catalog or maybe a boy from Nantucket. At the end of the day, I have always had a fondness for plaid, but I think my fondness was amplified and sent into straight love when I saw one of my celebrity free passes, Vince Vaughn, walk down steps in Wedding Crashers in patchwork plaid pants. My heart skipped a beat. My stomach dropped. My knees buckled. I was in love. Since then there is nothing I love more than a boy that owns, I mean really owns some rocking awesome plaid.
What defines awesome plaid? I can’t really answer that. I can tell you it does not involve any pastel colors that should be seen on a 13 year old girl, i.e. Hot Pink, Pink, Purple, Robins Egg Blue. In fact, boys, give up the pink already (this goes hand in hand with popped collars) and girls give up the pink team jerseys – there is no team with pink as their colors…that is a story for another day. I digress. Boys, plaid must be in masculine colors. Also, don’t pair it with some random ratty t-shirt. Put it with a nice polo or solid shirt. No holes or pit stains. I think you understand.
With this said, this will be my last discussion of this plaid topic. Should you have any questions in this topic please feel free to discuss them amongst yourself in the comments section or send them to my assistant…oh wait I don’t have one. I think the kids of twitter will be happy to end this convo once and for all. Viva la plaid – unless it’s done wrong.
lifetimes of paper rainbows…W